Loveless

Hi there, do you believe in true love? Well, I don't believe in true love.

What is true love? It's a fairy tale kind of thing based on Summer (500 days of summer) although in the end she admitted that she was wrong, but I totally agree with her first impression about true love. True love is only for those romantic movies, dreams that people like to have, but just a dream anyway. Girls believe in true love just like kids believe in Santa Claus. There is no true love, people were being trapped by those fairy tales. Relationship is tiring, you need to understand one each other for a piece of love?



On the other side - The Strokes

I'm tired of everyone I know,
of everyone I see
on the street
and on TV.

On the other side,
on the other side
nobody's waiting for me.
On the other side

I hate them all.
I hate them all.
I hate myself for hating them,
so I'll drink some more.
I love them all.
I'll drink even more.
I'll hate them even more
than I did before.

On the other side,
on the other side
nobody's waiting for me.
On the other side.

I remember when you came,
you taught me how to sing.
Now, it's seems so far away.
You taught me how to sing...

I'm tired of being so judgemental
of everyone
I will not go to sleep.
I will train my eyes to see
that my mind is as blind
as a branch on a tree.

On the other side,
on the other side.
I know what's waiting for me.
On the other side.
On the other side,
on the other side
I know you're waiting for me.
On the other side.

01.01.2010

Hi..
Hello..
2010

It's a pleasure to meet you. Please be kind to me. I'm gonna need to make some deals with you Mr (or Miss) 2010.

1. If I'm a good girl within 2010, please be nice to me as well
2. If I'm a bit naughty in the beginning of 2010, please let me know before its too late
3. If possible, can I travel to Melbourne to meet my friend Nana in the mid of 2010? or maybe going to US?
4. Hmm, which part I need to focus to improve myself? I want to become healthier, tidier, more organize and can I get a job in the place I want?

That's all for now.. Don't forget, Please be nice to me Mr (or Miss) 2010

Cheers!

I'M DONEE!!

Just finished my last final exam. It wasn't that bad. Hope will get an A for this subject. Thesis & internship to go, after that I'm done from this uni life. FINALLY!!!

Thanks GOD ;)

The Last Final Exam

I'm supposed to study, but here I am chatting my time away, browsing and stalking. Tomorrow (oh well, in 12 more hours) I'm gonna have my last final exam. Hows it gonna be? Actually, I don't feel that I'm ready enough to finish everything, but I really want to finish this degree thingy soon. I hope I can pass. I hope I can get a good mark.

So, hello future please please please please let me get what I want ;)

Oh Noooo

I started to do online shopping. I used to get highly addicted to ebay, but I've stopped since 1 year ago. But I just found out about Malaysian online shopping, they provided branded bags with a good price. I couldn't resisted, just bought one. The seller said my bag will come tomorrow, yeaahh! I hope it will be good. See you tomorrow my new bag

Cheerio

My wedding day

Hey you

I don't know (yet) who you are. I don't know what are the things we've been through until we finally here. Because you're gonna marry me anytime soon, I hope you can understand why I'm writing this for you.

I've imagined my wedding day since I can't remember. I've changed my taste of music 100 times, I've changed partners, I've changed here and there. But there are something I want to ask you, I wont change my mind for these.

The List for our wedding day:

1. I want God Only Knows as our wedding song. I found this song as the most romantic but yet realistic love song. I do realized that you are the best for me (that's why I wanna marry you) but this is not our happy ending. This is our beginning, so I don't wanna stay in fairytale world, I want everything to be realistic, since the beginning.

2. I don't want to put too much make up. I want to be the real me. You're marrying me, not the queen for one day.

3. If possible, I want to make it small and romantic. Then we can save the money to run away from all those responsibilities. Let's go to Maldives or somewhere baby.

4. Don't spend too much money in our wedding

5. Keep the cake small

6. I want wine as our wedding souvenirs :)

7. Keep it real and everlasting

8. Let me do the list for our wedding songs

I think that's all for now. I hope you can understand. If you're really rich, maybe we can ask Jens Lekman to sing at our wedding.

The wedding songs:

1. God Only Knows - The Beach Boys
2. When I'm Sixty Four - The Beatles
3. Don't Worry Baby - The Beach Boys
4. Dedicated to the one I love - The Mamas and The Papas
5. Everybody's Gonna Be Happy - The Kinks

Oh yeah, on our wedding anniversary, please listening to When I'm Sixty Four - The Beatles over and over again.

I Love You

Let's keep it realistic and everlasting

See you soon my very special one ;)

Who Am I?

Well, this is my last semester. Next semester, I must do my thesis and internship. There are so many things happening this year. Sadly, after I've been through so many things, I still don't know who is the girl inside me. I couldn't be truthfully honest to everyone. I couldn't tell everything even to the most important people in my life.

If I need to fill up the most honest "About Me", it would be like this;

My name is Jessica Valentina (I don't like the fact that my birth certificate spelled my name as Jessicha). I'm 23 years old, currently I'm pursuing a degree in Mass Communication. I love the fact that I have a big family. I love my nephews and nieces, especially Darren. I hate cat, I hate hypocrite people, I hate you most of the time. I love myself, I love to see that I'm unbeatable for almost everything. I'm really good in complaining about people. I'm good in doing others' assignments, but not really good in my assignments.

I LOVE:
* my blue pillow
* Darren
* my parents
* lyrics
* good movies
* being unreachable
* being the most reliable person
* being the first one for almost everything
* anything that people don't like
* YOU, if you think I'm hard to get and smart
* shopping
* stalking people's blogs
* being the most informative person
* rainy day
* to make my exes' current girlfriends feel insecure ;]
* to make you feel insecure

I hate:
* CAT
* people who think they know everything
* people who love to pretend
* people who think that he/she is the most unique creature but the fact he/she just a person with a common taste
* people who got the last laugh
* sunny day
* YOU, if you think you are the most perfect creature in this world

The jobs I've done this year:
* waitress at house + co
* sales assistant at blueberry
* selling clothes door to door
* assignments service
* sales promotion girl (will do it this weekend)

What I wanna do next year:
?????

What I wanna be in the next five years:
?????

Do you love me?
Do you think you will be able to spend the rest of your life with me?
Am I good enough for you?
Am I tough?

Should I get a BlackBerry?

Oh well, hi..

These days, I got highly addicted to twitter.. My part time job as a stalker is getting more opportunity because of twitter. Anyway, I've been amazed with those people who are able to share their feelings in twitter, blogs, facebook and whatsoever. It's not easy for me to share my feelings using that kind of media. I admit that I'm a gossiper, I like to talk a lot and stalking people. But still, I can't really share my feelings with everyone. I can share some of my thoughts, but just some.

Oh well, should I get a BlackBerry? so I can keep updating my feelings toward my boyfriend, my problems and thoughts everywhere? (I don't really want BlackBerry though :P) I can't understand why some people are able to share their feelings in twitter (esp. for those couples who keep twitting "love message" to one each other). Actually, I don't really care with those twitter users who keep updating their status, where, when and with who.. But for those who keep updating their feelings in twitter, Hello MISTER?? Why they let strangers accessing their private lives?

Please..please..please.. answer me.. why do u wanna share your feelings, your love with your bf/gf, your almost everything in twitter? Are you trying to proclaim something?

hello monday

This is my first post since i cant remember.. this is my last semester in Help (hopefully), although i still have thesis and internship to do.

So, I'm gonna go to Bangkok again on 24 sept. I cant wait for the shopping time, exploring the new places and etc.

I love you more and more each day!

cheers!

Here comes weekend!

Jens Lekman makes me want to write again. I have this never ending “love” with him. It started on 2007 and until now I’m still repeating his songs over and over again. Currently, I’m listening to The Summer Never Ends. Summer never ends in Malaysia. Shinny days with unexpected heavy rains.


I’m happy today and yesterday as well. I spent quality time with Charlie.. Yesterday was our 9 months anniversary. We went out to have a late lunch, movie and durian. It was so cheap though to have durian now. Eat as much as you can, and its only 9 rm.

Today, I went to the church, lunch then made sandwiches at home. It’s just perfect!

Speaking about church.. why people are still going to the church today? Is it because they have to? Are they really listening to the priest?

"the churches filled with losers, psycho or confused" Gronlandic Edit - Of montreal

Are they?

I always try to go the church every Sunday, although I’ve missed a lot of Sundays, because I feel so blessed. Yes, I’m just so blessed. I always (well almost) can get whatever I want. I can’t really understand what the priest says. I’m late most of the time. To be honest, I can’t get anything from the mass itself. I go there not because I have to.. I go there because I want to pay tribute to the Lord. I just want to thank Him for what he has given to me. Am I wrong?


Please, answer me..

Money..money.. moneyyyyyyyyy....

Oh yes, I need MONEY!

I'm not ready to talk about money now, let's talk about anything else.

I've finished working in House+Co. To be honest, the boss getting nicer in the last few days. So, I'm gonna work there again, but only for few days.

Sadly, she hasn't given out the SALARY until now. Oh dear Ms. Pauline... I need MONEY, NOW!!!!!!!!

Lately, I keep thinking about people without literacy ability. There's one lady in House+Co, she's a Malay and she can't read and write. She knows number, but totally blind about words. She can work quite fast, but she has slow us down. There were a lot of time that she ended up misleading us. Her responsibility is to make coffee and tea. In the peak hours, the waitresses were getting panic because we need to be FAST! SIX GEAR! Then, when the coffee was ready, we need to double check where the coffee is belong to.. sometimes she just simply pointing on random chit order, which is caused us sending it to the wrong table.

After that, I started to think; what kind of world I'd have if I can't read and write? Yes, it will cause big differences if we can read and write. It might be a simple thing, but it has helped us a lot.. It has opened our minds and souls.

I thank God for that..

I need to pray more about Money..

After all, I think I'm gonna have exciting days soon.

29-31 May; PENANG
18-21 June; Bangkok..


I wish for all the best lucks I can get..

Ciao!

Hell No

Chika has been working for House+co restaurant since last week. She supposed to have her holiday, free from assignments and all those stressful stuffs. Unfortunately, she needs the cash. Thus, she decided to take a part time job in House+co instead of flying back to Jakarta. She was quite sure to herself, that she can take everything. She thought that she’s though enough to meet those demanding costumers (and the boss).

Beside House+co, Chika is working in Blueberry Boutique as well. Blueberry’s bosses, Ashley & Joe are extremely nice to her. She wants to work there more often; regrettably she only can work there 5 days per month.

Then, straightly after final exam Chika started to work again in House+co. Then, here she is.. feeling unsure about herself. Feeling extremely lazy to wake up tomorrow morning but she has to. She keeps thinking the reasons she has to tell to the lovely kak Miza so she can escape from Saturday and Sunday duty. She gets so tired with almost everything in House+co.. The boss and costumers are too demanding for her. It seems she never do anything right. Although she has trying so hard to do all the things she can, it seems never enough. ARGHH!! She’s running all over the store for 5 hours.. She was having a very late lunch today. In the end, she’s done something wrong. She realized, those complaints from the boss are not big stuffs. But, she just can’t take it today.

Oh dear Chika, you only have 10 more days.. 10 more days to have enough cash.. Come on girl, you can do it. Just ignore those things. Just be patient, 10 more days only babyyyyy….. see you in 10 days and let’s see how Chika’s feeling is.

Happy Belated Birthday to ME!

I'm officially 23 years old and one day, today. My birthday was great. I was kinda surprised that the 00.00 surprise was came from my friend. I'm going to celebrate my birthday on March 28th, 2009. Make sure that you are invited!

cheers

err.. hellooooo

I know, it's too late for new year resolutions or whatsoever. It's been a long time since my last post. It's only few days left to my next birthday. I'm gonna be 23 years old in 4 days.

TO DO LIST (22 years old):

* pull up my grade (oh God please help me)
* graduate in 1 ½ years
* be a good daughter
* be a good girlfriend J
* be a good auntiee
* find a part time job or internship.
* save more money
* be more responsible and mature
* be closer to God

I wrote those things a year ago.

* pull up my grade
it's not really working, hehe..
*graduate in 1 1/2 years
unfortunately, I'll finish my study at the end of this year. I was planning to finish all my subjects, internship and thesis at the mid of this year. Then, I found out that graphic design is going to be offer in september.. aarrgghh, so I need to extend one more semester.
*be a good daughter
well, I'm trying
*be a good girlfriend :)
Am I good enough? haha
*be a good auntieeee
*find a part time job or internship
I found a part time job. Actually, I'm kinda proud of myself because of this. I've been working for a boutique in Bangsar named Blueberry since February. They offered me to go to Bangkok. It's just so exciting =)=)=)
*save more money
I'm tryingggggggggg
*be more responsible and mature
*be closer to God

So far, only one mission has accomplished - part time job.

Something I've learned so far;
*It is hard to make someone happy.
I just realized this in the past few months. It's not that simple to make someone happy. You might wanna throw a surprise, making a small gift or etc. But it's not enough. It's not easy.. Your expectations might be too much; the people might not realized how much effort you have put to make them happy. So, I have promised myself, I won't try make any small gifts, surprises or whatever for others anymore. From now, I just wanna make CHIKA happy =)
*Quality friends
I don't really care about new friends anymore. I just wanna keep my best.

- I'm still not sure what I wanna do after graduating. I'm totally blur...

TO DO LIST:

- Pull up my grade
- pass all the nine subjects left
- INTERNSHIP
- THESIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Finish all the college thingy at the end of this year
- start to save money, not for bags or clothes.. see something new, traveling, get out from this country.
- Be patient
- Be a good daughter
- Be a good auntiee
- Be a good sister
- Be a good girlfriend
- Be a good friend
- Be a good Catholic
- Think more about the future
- Read more
- Learn more
- lose another 7 kilograms
- Stop dreaming!

Wish me luck..

Ciao!

absolutely cuckoo

I wanna write so many things, but I got frustrated with the internet connection.

Current Addictions:
* Into eternity - Jens Lekman
"I'll choose this moment with you in my arms"
* a long chat with darren
* long distance call

Well, maybe some other time then.

cheerio

Arrivals Gate

Here I am, sitting on departures gate.

I started to think about the arrivals gate.

From Love Actually:

“Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around.”

I do love arrivals gate. Arrivals gate is the place for happiness. Seeing someone you've been waiting for. When we have a holiday, going to the departures gate is interesting. But when you've reached the arrivals gate, the journey begins.

Departures gate brings sadness. This is the place when you need to leave something or someone. The place when the cries and goodbyes meet. The place to move on or maybe the place for separation (even it's just for a while)

Well, I'm waiting for the arrivals gate in Jakarta. After that, wait me in the arrivals gate of KLIA my dear. I'm living for that day. The day to meet someone I've loved in the arrivals gate.

cheerio

Oh Dear

I'm going homeee..

Am I happy?
Hmmm yeah.

After the bad experience with Lion Air (I've promised to myself that I wont take Lion Air again) I'm glad that I can go home today.

I'll meet my family, Darren (aahh)

But I've left my heart here in Malaysia.

I'll be back on 3rd of January 2009.

A new year.

Oh my dear future
I don't know what will you be like
Oh my dear future
I hope everything will be alright
Oh dear
Can't wait to see you in the future

Well, I can't wait for the 3rd of January.

<3

PS; oh dear, please keep my heart with you. Until I see you again (3rd of January for sure!)

JENS LEKMAN & VIKTOR SJOBERG - ASIAN TOUR

Jens Lekman's finally here. Last night was the last day for his Asian Tour. The show in Bandung is canceled because of the airlines problem (miss flight, haha). Luckily, he still wants to fly all the way from Hong Kong to here, Kuala Lumpur (actually, he should).

The uncertainties of the show were quite high. I hadn't had the tickets until last night. I reached Annexe Gallery at 7.40 pm, but the tickets were not on sale yet. I waited until 8-ish to get the tickets, well it wasn't even a ticket its just stamp in my hand.

When I reached there, Jens Lekman & Viktor Sjoberg was doing the sound check. I was able to see them to do the sound check, Jens Lekman was playing "Another Sweet Summersnight On Hammer Hill ". It feels so good to see him there. I've never imagined that I would be that "close" to him.

I was so hungry, but I chose to be there. Yes, that's the right decision, because after the sound check I got to meet him.

He was sweet enough to the fans. I took pictures with him and he even signed the Polaroid after that.


The show started at 9 pm. 30 minutes late from the schedule. I was so excited.. The opening acts were Silent Scenery and Stoned Revivals. Silent Scenery wasn't that good, maybe because they're not complete and lack of preparation. In fact, it was kinda boring. After that Stoned Revivals came with more preparation. Stoned Revivals was not that disappointed. It was good enough, if I wasn't waiting for Jens Lekman.



Jens Lekman and Viktor Sjoberg played the first song "I'm leaving you, because I don't love you". Audience was still sitting and after that song Jens asked the audience to stand up. The real show started.

Jens played "The opposite of Hallelujah", "Julie", "A postcard to Nina", "You are the light", "Black Cab", "Shirin" and a lot more. He played the songs about his pen pal into his hairdresser. He played the songs, he joked, he was interacting with the audience, he just melted everyone's hearts. He acted, he sings the rhyme, and he has made the small crowd having fun in the Tuesday night.

His baritone voice definitely melted the girls' hearts. His jokes have made the guys laugh. He did some freaky things. He sings from his heart. He made the audience dancing and singing together. He successfully made us feeling happy into eternity.

He should get more than just RM 30. The waiting was worth it. I did have a lot of fun. Even the equipments were not that good, but he had made it part of the show. He just said that he hates technology and started singing without microphone; it has covered the disappointment in audience's heart. I missed his ukulele though; I wish I could see him singing with the ukulele. But that's alright.

The show ends with the clip of him flying an airplane. He sang "Into eternity" Both of them came to the audience and they were dancing with the audience. Then he said if we want more, he will sings to us one by one because his songs has deep meaning for him. The naiveness of me, I feel that all of his songs are the reflection of his self. It's honest and he just being honest with his sarcastic jokes. And that's why I love him more.

I love small gig when the audience could get in touch with the band. I think Jens Lekman's show shouldn't get bigger. Bcos that's the selling point from listening to his songs. He just the singer in the cafe with baritone voice that has melted the girls' hearts. He needs to be close to the audience, to get in touch and leaving the audience with the unforgettable moment and indescribable feeling.Yes he's worth more than RM 30, I wouldn't mind paying RM 200 for him. But I want the same small crowd.

I enjoyed the show. Satisfied. But I want more..... Well, I just need to make believe. Until the next show Jens..

Yours Truly,

Chika

The Day

Today is December 9, 2008. December 9, 2008 is suppose to be the happiest day in December for Chika. Chika's exam has finished. She's going to Jens Lekman's show tonight. She has been waiting for today since two weeks ago.

But, here she is. Writing her blog and feeling lonely.

Lonely?

Indeed, lonely..

She doesn't has anything to do. She's hungry but has no one to go lunch with. She's watching Serendipity from surfthechannel. She wants to go home.......

Now, she started to think that waiting for today is a lot more exciting than today itself.

Preparing for today is a lot more interesting than having today without the excitement..

She's hoping the show tonight will cure her loneliness.

She needs the night.

:(

Boisa-Bis-O-Boisa

Charlie checked www.jenslekman.com two weeks ago, then he found that Jens Lekman is having Asian Tour. yeayy!

ASIA
Dec ? - Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia - TBA
Dec 6 - Bandung, Indonesia - dirgantara I IPTN
Dec 4 - Shanghai, China - Glamour
Dec 3 - Shanghai, China- JZ Club
Dec 2 - Beijing, China - MAO Live
Dec 1 - Singapore - The White Rabbit LINK
Nov 30 - Seoul, South Korea - Freebird
Nov 29 - Seoul, South Korea - Freebird

AARRGGHHH... I wanted to scream when I see the schedule. I have final exam on Dec 4 -6. It's impossible for me to go to Singapore on the Dec 1 or going back to Bandung on Dec 6, huhu.


I chatted with my friend, Poppy, she's going to watch Jens Lekman in Bandung. She told me that her friend is a photographer for Jens Lekman's opening band and the gig will be held in The Annexe Gallery, Central Market.

I've been waiting for few days, but The Annexe Gallery hasn't updated their calendar yet (until now!)

I called The Annexe Gallery last Monday, they are confirm that Jens Lekman will be there on Dec 9(yay!), ticket price around RM 30-35. The person in The Annexe Gallery gave me an email of Jens Lekman's event organizer in Malaysia. I emailed him asking about how to get the ticket, and he replied "tickets will be available at the venue at the date of the show and the show will start at 8.30 pm."

I've decided that I'll come at 5 pm, hihi.

Well, I still have final exam before that gig. I'm studying Communication Theory right now (oh mercy mercy me Mr. Kannan), I learned about Uncertainty Reduction Theory. One of the axioms stated that when the level of uncertainty is high, seeking information behavior increases. I guess that theory is absolutely correct for my case. When the uncertainty of Jens Lekman's gig is high, I have high level of seeking information behavior. I've checked The Annexe Gallery events, called the person and emailed the EO. I'm so glad that I can apply this theory to real life experience (maksa, hehe)

Wish me luck for the exams and Jens, I'm truly yours.














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